They Don’t Prepare Us Enough For Birth & After Birth

I saw different midwives throughout my first pregnancy, they never actually took the time to answer any of my questions, I always felt kind of rushed out once they had done all the examinations they needed to do. The consultant was a little more helpful, actually listened to me and answered all my concerns. My first pregnancy was a walk in the park. I was incredibly ill but that wasn’t actually linked to the pregnancy whatsoever so it was okay.

We get told tons and tons about actual pregnancy, whether it be through going to a pregnancy related class, attending midwife/consultant appointments and etc.  But we don’t get told about anything that may happen at birth or even after birth.

I feel like I was quite lucky with my first labour, everything went perfectly. I did have a third degree tear but it was stitched right back up and I didn’t have any problems with it. But I know so many people around me weren’t so lucky to have such an easy delivery. Some had to have intervention with forceps, others an emergency c-section for different reasons and etc. Hearing other people’s birth stories, especially of those around me, really got me thinking how easy I had it and how screwed I would have been if that had been me. Nobody told me the possible things that could happen during labour or any interventions needed if anything went wrong and why. Another thing that got me thinking is that my next pregnancy may not be like my first and labour may not be like my first either so I want to be prepared. You can bet I’m going to be doing tons of research this time, just in case.

And last but not least, after birth. I feel like after birth was worse than labour. After I gave birth, it was like learning to sit and walk again. We had to stay in hospital for 24 hours due to Group B Strep (which may I add, I was only told we would need antibiotics but actually had to google what it was) and I couldn’t get up the whole time. And yes, I was doing Christmas shopping within a couple of days of giving birth but the pain was so much worse when sitting down and standing still, rather than when I was moving so I tried to stay as active as I was able to. Nobody really told me to expect excessive amounts of bleeding for weeks, they also didn’t tell me how to know my stitches were doing okay or not and what signs to look out for in case they became inflamed or infected. There’s just so much they don’t prepare us for.

But something positive did come from the lack of information from professionals, I was able to research lots and I feel so much more prepared for my next delivery with the next baby. I still remember everything that helped me from pain relief to little tips that made after-birth pain manageable. So I’m excited to use all I know from experience ready for next time.

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